Spring Chicken

I don't know when it happened, but somewhere along the line I got old. Not dead old, not geriatric, but as the saying goes, I'm no spring chicken. I know this, because more and more I find myself not only feeling like a tannie, but worse, not caring. (A sure sign of old age).

I actually used to look forward to getting old. I was shy and insecure so it sounded great to become one of those old tannies who walked to the shop in their pajamas, giving everyone that stared the finger. And sure enough, I've just dropped some tupperware at my neighbour. In my pajamas. It was only two doors down, but it's a slippery slope. Two doors today, two blocks tomorrow then, before you know it, you're shuffling between two shopping centres in your slippers looking for baked beans on special.

And let me not even get started on all the sexy varsity students crawling around Obz. Getting hot and bothered around them has a whole new meaning these days. When I do speak to them now it's not to ask them to go down but to keep it down. I used to wanna tap that now I just wanna smack that.

So be it. As long as I'm still capable of fowl [sic] thought, I'm OK that I'm not a spring chicken anymore. The truth be told, I may be too old for a young rooster, but I'm certainly young enough for an old cock. Ahem. 

xx

J

CHICKEN SPRING ROLLS

400g Chicken cut very small

8 Dried mushrooms soaked for half an hour, drained and chopped finely

(I used Chantarelle but you're supposed to use Chinese)

150g Beansprouts

4 Spring onions sliced lengthwise

2 Small carrots julienned

2T Kikkoman soya 

2T 5 Spice powder

2t Ginger grated

2T Oyster sauce

30 Spring Roll wrappers (about 15cm square)

2t Maizena mixed with 2t water 

Sweet chilli sauce

Fry the chicken and mushrooms until done then add in the soya and the 5 spice powder. Cool, then mix together with the rest of the vegetables, the 5 spice, ginger and oyster sauce. Season to taste. Lay two spring rolls on top of each other pointy side up. Put about 2T in the centre then bring in the sides. Start rolling up the filling from the bottom then stick the wrapper down with the Maizena. Fry, drain well and serve immediately with sweet chilli sauce.

Subs Thai Tute

I have to bitch. I am sick and tired of finding great recipes containing ingredients that aren't available in this country. In fact, I think my most frequent word used on Google is "substitute". Take this really good Thai Fishcake recipe - it required coconut powder which, of course, is nowhere to be found. It's a Delia Smith recipe but on her website she unhelpfully and smugly advises "sadly no other coconut product will do".

As it turns out coconut powder can NOT be made by grinding dessicated coconut (or desecrated coconut like my ex used to say). It is, in fact, a type of flour, similar to oat flour, which for the record, CAN be made by grinding rolled oats. The difference between oat flour and normal flour is that oat flour absorbs more liquid, which is why these fishcakes don't fall apart like fishcakes so often do.

So, since I couldn't find coconut powder, I substituted with a combination of oat flour (for absorption) and dessicated coconut (for taste). It worked just fine - suck that Delia. And a great big slobbery thanks to those wonderful places like Giovanni's and Komati Foods, who actually give a shit that people like me need ingredients other than flippen Snowflake Cake Flour.

And while we're talking about Thai Fishcakes and exes, allow me to share another beautiful brainfreeze moment by the above ex. We were travelling through Thailand and his 3 Irish tastebuds were deeply suspicious of all the seafood and spices and selections. As he was once again scrutinising a menu board with great paranoia, he pointed accusingly at "Fishcakes" and whispered: "Jaysus, these fecking people even put fish in their CAKE!"

God love him, but HIS substitution was probably a blessing...

xx
J

THAI FISHCAKES WITH SESAME AND LIME DIPPING SAUCE

Fishcakes

500g Hake skinned and chopped

1 Stem lemon grass chopped

2 Cloves garlic chopped

1cm Ginger peeled and chopped

3T Coriander leaves

Zest of 1 lime

1 Chilli deseeded and chopped

1/4 Red pepper chopped

25g Dessicated coconut

50g Oat flour

Zap together everything but the fish, flour and coconut until quite fine. Add the fish and zap that in very well. Mix in the coconut and flour but don't overprocess. Season well. Shape into fairly flat patties. I got 12 out of this mix. Refrigerate for an hour or so. Coat the patties in seasoned flour and fry slowly until cooked and golden.      

Dipping Sauce

1t Sesame seeds toasted

1T Sesame oil

1T Lime juice

1t Fish sauce

1T Soy sauce

1 Chilli deseeded and chopped

Mix everything together.

Eggsellence

Have you ever wondered what God has for breakfast? Eggs Benedict.

Firstly, it contains everything that's good in the world. Ham, eggs, bread, butter, cream and some spinach to make you feel less guilty about the ham, eggs, bread, butter and cream. Secondly, it contains a miracle. 

I'm talking about Hollandaise sauce. You see, it really shouldn't work. But thanks to God, it does. More specifically, it works thanks to the triple threat of three emulsifiers (lemon juice, mustard and egg yolks).  Everyone knows if you shake up a mixture of oil and water they'll temporarily mix, but pretty soon the oil droplets will stick together again, thereby separating the two once more. To keep them separated you need an emulsifier. Half of the emulsifier hates water and embeds itself in the oil, but the other end is drawn to water so it sticks out of the oil into the water, thereby preventing the oil from sticking together. A miracle.   

And if that doesn't impress you, watch this. The sauce will probably curdle because, like God, it likes to occasionally torture you. Don't despair. Add a humble egg yolk and you will hear angels sing as it comes together in a glorious silky miracle. 

Amazing. Someone really should give That Man a Bells...

xx

J   

EGGS BENEDICT

50g Butter

3 Eggs

1/2T Lemon juice

Pinch of English mustard

1T Cream

1 English muffin

1c Baby spinach

2 Slices good ham

To poach the eggs, you can be really good and do the water twirly stuff. Or you can cheat and put clingwrap in a cup, spray or rub with oil then break the egg into it. Tie it at the top. Cook in very slowly simmering water until done to your taste. In the meantime melt the butter in the microwave. Beat together 1 egg yolk, the lemon juice, cream and mustard and season. Stir into the melted butter. Heat in the microwave for 10s at a time, stirring and checking carefully to ensure it doesn't split. If it does, you know what to do. Slice the muffin in half and toast. Wilt the spinach. To assemble layer the spinach, ham then egg. Season and pour over the hollandaise. And thank God.

Kama Sutra (Sorta)

It's hard to let go of the simple and the familiar. I'm the first one to untick the "Quick and Easy" section of recipe websites. And then when I read the hard and unusual ones my heart beats faster, my breath hitches, the blood rushes to my head... But then I chicken out and make a stew.

It's a little like reading the Kama Sutra. (Which, for the record, does NOT have a "Quick and Easy" section). I mean, how can you read it and not have your heart beating faster, your breath hitching, the blood rushing to, uhm. You get my drift. But at the end of the day you chicken out and do the Missionary. I mean, you can add boots (rosemary), you can speed it up (425F), you can even yell out the name of a god (Escoffier). But face it (excuse the pun), it's still the Missionary.

Boring be damned, I want to try some different things, some different ingredients. And while beetroot and roast garlic and green tea ice cream aren't exactly equivalent to doing The Monkey, give me a break. It's a start.      

As for the real Kama Sutra, when I start doing that you can read about it on my other blog - thewhoohoohoohooker.

xx

J

GRILLED ROSEMARY AND CHILLI RACK OF LAMB

6-Chop rack of lamb
4 Sprigs of rosemary
1 Clove garlic crushed
1T Dried chilli
1T Coriander seeds toasted

Bash together all the herbs and moisten with olive oil. Rub all over the lamb and marinade for a couple of hours. I suck at timing and my grill is 45 years old so timing is fluid. Also, some people like their lamb medium rare and I don't. Depending on how you like it I suggest 20 - 30 minutes at 425F on a highish rack.

MUSTARD SEED POTATOES, ROAST GARLIC, SHALLOTS, PEARS AND BEETROOT

3 Potatoes 

1t Turmeric 

1t Mustard seeds 

1 Whole garlic 

4 Shallots halved

1 Pear cored and sliced
1/2T Treacle sugar
1T Dried thyme 

3 Whole beetroot

Boil the potatoes in water with the turmeric until done. Fry the mustard seeds in a little oil until they start popping. Toss together with the potatoes.

 
For the beetroot all I could find were the ones with leaves. Eeek. You mean they don't come out of the ground in crinkle cut?! So after exhaustive research I discovered what you have to do is cut off the leaves 5cm or so from the beetroot, then cover with water and cook for 1-2 hours, depending on size. Apparently you can do something with the leaves. I've done something with them. It involved the bin. The awesome thing is they say you'll know the beetroot is done when the skin rubs off. And they do. SO deadly. To serve, quarter, season and toss with olive oil. 

As for the garlic? I thought cooking a whole head is a bit of an overkill. As it turns out, it was a little like having a cool condiment on your plate. And not half as stinky as you'd think. Or as garlicky. You think you'll scream but you'll only moan. To cook cut the garlic heads in half and put in a baking dish together with the shallots and pears. Brush with olive oil, sprinkle with the sugar and thyme and season. Roast on a rack below the lamb.

WHITE CHOCOLATE AND GREEN TEA ICE CREAM

250ml Milk

625ml Cream

1 Vanilla pod

3 Bags green tea

100g White chocolate

2 Drops green food colouring

9 Egg yolks

145g Castor sugar

Cut the pod in two lengthwise and bring to the boil with the milk and cream. Add the teabags and simmer for 10 minutes. Remove from the heat and scrape out the vanilla. Throw away the teabags. Stir in the chocolate and add the food colouring. Beat the eggs and sugar together until creamy. Over medium heat whisk in with the cream and stir until it thickens a bit. Cover and put in the fridge until it's cold enough to freeze. Freeze until the edges are hard but it's still soft in the centre, then whisk to break down the ice crystals. Do this at least 4 times to ensure it's silky.

Choc and Awe

I've been reading about military tactics. It's interesting - the various ways people choose to conduct wars. It's interesting - how similar it is to how people choose to handle conflict in relationships.
 

Shock and Awe: One party uses their overwhelming power and knowledge of battle in a display of dominant force (shock) with the intention of paralysing their adversary and destroying their will to fight (awe).

Blitzkrieg: One party uses their overwhelming artillery to break down the enemy with force and speed. The use of constant motion keeps their enemy off balance and unable to respond effectively.

Fabian Strategy: One party avoids assault in favour of wearing down their opponent. The enemy is harassed through mini-battles designed to cause attrition, affect morale and eradicate the will to fight.
 

I've been trying to decide which tactic appears most fair. Yes I know, all is fair in love and war. Only it's not, is it. It's not fair when someone overwhelms, or steamrolls, or demoralises.

In a way, I prefer Mutual Assured Destruction: A situation in which the full-scale use of weapons of mass destruction by the two opposing sides would effectively result in the complete, utter and irrevocable annihilation of both.

If both parties have everything to lose maybe they'll both back off. No one wins. But no one loses either. 

xx

J

RED VELVET CUPCAKES

 Cupcake

250g Flour
2T Cocoa
2t Baking powder
1/2t Baking soda
100g Butter
200g Caster sugar
2t Vanilla essence
2 Eggs
3/4c Buttermilk
1t White wine vinegar
Red food colouring

Mix flour, cocoa, baking powder and baking soda. Separately cream butter and sugar. Once pale add vanilla and red food colouring. Be careful here the stuff is seriously potent. Add 1 drop at a time. I think I ended up using about 1t. Slowly alternate adding the dry ingredients and eggs until everything is combined. Beat in the buttermilk and vinegar. Fill muffin/cupcake tin with cupcake wrappers and fill up halfway with the mixture. Bake at 325F for 20 minutes. Allow to cool completely before putting on icing. I got about 24 cupcakes out of the mixture.

Icing
 

500g Icing sugar
125g Cream cheese
125g Butter
1T Lemon juice

Mix cream cheese and butter. Add lemon juice and mix. Add icing and process until smooth.

BOOZY TRUFFLES

250g Bournville
55g Butter
2/3c Cream
3T Whisky
Cocoa to dust

Melt all the ingredients in a bowl over a pot of simmering water. Pour into a shallow dish and chill. Roll spoons of it into balls very quickly, roll in cocoa and chill until ready. Of course you can use brandy instead of whiskey if that's your preference. Or brandy essence, if you don't do booze. In which case don't forget to rename them to Boozy-Essency Truffles.

Motherless

So I had some people over for dinner last night. The unofficial theme was Let's-Get-Wasted. One of my favourites since I only need to focus on the food, leaving everyone responsible for their own booze/taxi/bedding/hangover. Of course, it has the added complication that I need to pace my own intake in order to get said food out in the correct order. It simply would not do to serve the salmon after the panna cotta. No matter how many gins you've had!

The party proceeded as many such parties do - with the slow polite getting-to-know-you gradually, then rapidly, disintegrating into tremulous confessions of TMI. ("Too Much Information" for those of you not fluent in text speak).

Which got me thinking. Why is it that so often when we get drunk and talking about our lives, we inevitably return to the age old theme of blaming our childhood for our problems? Specifically, our mothers. Seems most mothers couldn't do a damn thing right. Either she was too clingy or she was too aloof. Too critical or too indifferent. She didn't love you enough or she smothered you. Poor woman didn't stand a chance.

Am I saying there aren't crap mothers out there? Hell no. I'm not even saying they didn't screw us up. But what's sad is that a lot of us moaning and groaning about our mothers are mothers too now. And guess what? WE'RE screwed up. All I'm saying is, when you were shoving fish fingers up your nose and being a child your mother wasn't just your mother but a human being too. With problems of her own. And like you now, maybe, just maybe, she did the best she could. 

So give her a break. If only so that when YOUR child grows up and starts whining about how you screwed them up for life, you get to say (in that annoying self-righteous voice mothers always use):

"Well I never blamed MY mother!"

xx

J

CANAPÉS
 

Spinach, Camembert & Pear Chutney Canapés

1T Olive oil
2 Small pears chopped up finely (I used tinned)
1T Caster sugar
1T Red wine vinegar
1.5T Tomato sauce
2T Marsala

Half a Camembert

A few leaves of spinach

Use a smallish cookie cutter to press out circles and toast for 10-15 minutes at 400F, turning once. Add 3T water and simmer everything for 10 minutes or so until reduced and thick. Season and assemble.

Rocket, Brie & Red Onion Canapés

1T Olive oil
1 Medium red onion sliced thinly
1 Clove garlic sliced
1t Rosemary chopped finely
2t White wine vinegar
3t Soft brown sugar

Half a Brie

A few leaves of rocket

Use a smallish cookie cutter to press out circles and toast for 10-15 minutes at 400F, turning once. Fry the onion until soft. Add the garlic and rosemary and fry for another couple of minutes. Add the vinegar and sugar and stir well. Season and assemble.

MELANZANE PARMIGIANA

2 Aubergines
1 Onion finely chopped
2 Garlic cloves crushed
1/4c Chopped parsley
1T Dried oregano
1 Tin chopped tomatoes
2T Tomato paste
1c Mozzarella grated
1/2c Basil
1/4c Parmesan
300ml Cream

Slice the aubergines about 1/2-1cm thick. Sprinkle with salt, layer in a colander and put a weight on top (I used my mortar). Leave for half an hour or so and throw away the icky brown liquid that strained out. Fry the aubergine slowly in oil until soft and lightly coloured. Drain thoroughly on kitchen towel. Fry the onion and garlic until soft. Add the oregano, tomatoes and paste. Season and simmer for about about half an hour. Oil 6 ramekins (or you could do one big dish). Since ramekins are too small to use a knife and fork I quartered my aubergine slices. Layer the aubergine, followed by the mozzarella, basil then tomato sauce. Repeat until you've filled the dish. Sprinkle with parmesan. I pre-prepared mine by baking at 360F for 20 minutes, then cooled it and put it in the fridge until I was ready to serve. Then heat them at 360F for another 10 minutes. Pour 50ml cream into each ramekin and bake for another 10 minutes.

SALMON EN CROÛTE WITH SPINACH & HERB SAUCE

Salmon en Croûte 

4 x 175g Salmon fillets
150g Full fat cream cheese
120g Watercress, rocket & spinach
500g Shortcrust pastry
1T Lemon juice
1 Egg whisked

Whizz together the cheese, leaves and lemon juice, then season well. Roll out the pastry to about 1/2cm and divide into 4. Place a fillet on each square and use half the sauce to cover the fillets. Bring the tops of the pastry together and pinch. Do the same for the sides and trim where necessary. Make a couple of slices in the pastry to allow steam to escape and brush with egg. Bake at 400F for 20-30 minutes. I covered mine half way through with foil to prevent the pastry from browning further.

This part is so deadly. To test if the salmon is done, stick a sharp knife through one of the steam vents. Leave for 3 seconds then immediately press it against the inside of your wrist. If it's hot, the salmon's done. How cool is that!

Lemon and Dill Mash

6 Large potatoes
2T Lemon juice
1T Olive oil
1T Chopped dill
1/4c Butter
1/4c Milk
1/4c Cream
1t Baking powder

Cook the potatoes until soft. Mash everything together. Season.

Apple and Fennel Slaw

1/4c Sour cream
1/4c Mayonnaise
1/4c Buttermilk
2T Lemon juice
1t Dijon mustard
1T Apple cider vinegar
2t Sugar
1t Poppy seeds
1/2t Salt
3 Small fennel bulbs
2 Tart apples (Pink Lady looks pretty)
1/2c Cabbage

Combine everything.

ESPRESSO PANNA COTTA WITH MOCHA SAUCE AND CAPPUCCINO BISCOTTI

Espresso Panna Cotta
 

500ml Cream
250ml Full cream milk
1 Vanilla pod
7 Gelatin leaves
200g Caster sugar
50ml Strong espresso (If not strong enough add coffee granules, not more liquid coffee)

Cut the vanilla pod in half and scrape the paste out into the cream and milk. Heat slowly, add the sugar and stir until dissolved. Remove from heat and allow to infuse for half an hour. Soak gelatin in cold water. Strain cream mixture and slowly reheat. Add the coffee and the gelatin and stir until melted. Pour into moulds and allow to set for at least 2 hours. To unmould dip into hot water for a few seconds, cover with plate and tip over.

Mocha Sauce

45g Bournville
50g Cream
1T Strong coffee
1/2 - 1T Sugar

Melt everything in a bowl over a pot of simmering water. Allow to cool slightly before pouring over the panna cotta.

Cappuccino Biscotti

280g Flour
150g Sugar
1t Baking powder
1/4t Salt
1/2t Cinnamon
1t Coffee
100g Chocolate chips
3 Eggs
1t Vanilla essence
Cinnamon sugar

Mix the dry ingredients (excluding the cinnamon sugar) very well. Whisk the eggs and essence. Pour into the dry ingredients and mix together. It might seem like it's too dry but access your inner child and start scrunching it with your hands, it comes together very well. Divide and roll into two logs about 20cm x 5cm. Cover a baking tray with parchment and place logs a few centimetres apart to allow for a bit of spreading. Sprinkle with cinnamon sugar and bake at 300F for 35-40 minutes. Allow to cool slightly then cut diagonally in slices about 1cm wide. Place back onto baking tray and bake for 10 minutes. Flip over then bake for another 10 minutes.

Final Feast

Steak has always been on the menu for my last meal. For years it was a T-Bone braaied by my dad with Royco Black Pepper Sauce mixed with Nestle tinned cream. My taste has improved slightly over time but I'm sticking with steak.

I suppose one can't expect class from your average scumbag sitting on death row. But I've looked up some last meals and really, some of these people have no taste. It's your last meal for God's sake, go big or go home (to your Maker). But dumb slag Aileen Wuornos, the woman Charlize played in Monster, had a burger from the prison canteen. And some coffee. (Because you really want to be awake before they put you to sleep). John Wayne Gacy, the piece of crap who killed 33 young men, had the right idea - going out with a cholesterol bang. He ordered deep-fried prawns, a bucket of KFC and chips. Timothy McVeigh, Mr Oklahoma Bomber, just had two pints of mint chocolate chip ice cream. (But then again, the dumb hick only had two braincells). My favourite is Victor Feguer, who killed a doctor for drugs. His choice was quite whimsical - he ordered a single black unpitted olive, hoping it would sprout from his body and grow an olive tree, a sign of peace. It did not. Moron.

I won't squander my last opportunity for gastric excellence. I can almost picture it. First come the last rites. Delivered by Richard Chamberlain from The Thorn Birds. Then the conjugal visit. Delivered by Christopher Meloni from Law and Order. Then the pepper crusted fillet with a creamy mushroom sauce and a tangy bearnaise to cut through the richness. Followed by the delicate panna cotta with a deliciously tart coulis. Delivered by Robbie Williams. Naked.

Ah yes, my final hours. Perfectly executed.

xx

J 

 

BLACK PEPPER FILLET WITH BEARNAISE & PORTOBELLO SAUCE

Steak

I'm not going to tell you how to do your steak. It's a personal taste kind of thing. But for the record I rolled mine in Maldon salt and black peppercorns I crushed in a mortar and pestle (not a grinder please). I flash fried it on very hot to seal then stuck it in the oven on 360F for 15 minutes.

Portobello Sauce

1 Pack Portobello mushrooms sliced
1/2 Onion chopped finely
2 Cloves garlic crushed
1T Thyme (for dry use 1/2T)
3T Butter
5T Flour
1.5c Milk
1/4c Cream

Melt butter and fry onions and garlic until soft. Add mushrooms and cover to sweat for 10 minutes on medium heat. Season and add thyme. Add flour and fry for a couple of minutes. Slowly add milk until you have a thick mushroom sauce, then add the cream.

Bearnaise Sauce

1 Shallot chopped finely
1T Butter
1/2t White pepper
1T Tarragon (I only had dried, if using fresh you need 2T)
3T White wine vinegar
3T White wine
2 Egg yolks
100g Butter in little blocks
1T Lemon juice

Fry the shallot in the butter until soft. Add the pepper, tarragon, vinegar and wine. Boil until reduced to 1T. Strain. In a bowl over a pot of slowly simmering water whisk the egg yolks then add the reduced liquid. Slowly add the butter, whisking continuously. Add the lemon juice but taste to ensure the balance is right. Keep warm over very slowly simmering water until ready to serve. Be careful, this is one pain in the ass sauce. If it gets too hot it'll split and you're done.

VANILLA PANNA COTTA WITH STRAWBERRY & LIME COULIS

Panna Cotta

2c Cream
1/4c Sugar
1 Vanilla bean
3 Leaves of gelatin

Cut the vanilla bean in half and scrape the paste into the cream. Add the split beans to the cream and heat. Add the sugar and stir until dissolved. Set aside and allow to infuse for half an hour. Soak the gelatin in cold water for 5 minutes. Reheat the cream and vanilla mix slowly, add the gelatin and stir until melted. Pour into moulds and chill in the fridge for at least 2 hours.

Strawberry and Lime Coulis

250g Strawberries quartered
2T Sugar
2T Lime juice

Combine everything in a pot and simmer slowly until reduced and thickened. If it's taking too long you can use Maizena to speed things up. I whizzed mine a bit with a blender to get more of a saucy consistency.

Comfort Me

Life is unfair. When you're down, you crave fat and sugar and carbs. Which first makes you feel guilty then makes you fat. Which of course makes you feel down. And round and round we go. Wouldn't it have been nice if God had a modicum of sympathy for the fact that it's near impossible to get shagged with a fat ass? Look, I know we're over-populated and this might just be God's way of keeping the numbers down. Specifically, ensuring fat people don't breed. Culling by weight, so to speak.

If life were fair, imagine feeling the burden of life crushing down on you, the worries and the weariness, and going: "Ooooooooh, I would just KILL for a plate of crudites!" Or going to the shop and bypassing the bakery, the charcuterie, the confectionary and the dairy in order to get to the grocery. Not to mention the clock striking 5 p.m or 11 a.m. (as is your need) and thinking "Ooooooooh, I would just KILL for a bottle of still water!". Or, God forbid, passing by a treadmill and saying "Oooooooh, I would just KILL to run mindlessly to nowhere while my legs turn to jelly!"

But Noooooooh. Life is unfair. Which is why I want food with a calorie count in the triple digits. And alcohol content in the double digits. And a treadmill to which I can give a single digit. My middle finger.

xx
J

QUICHE LORRAINE

Pastry
120g Butter
165g Flour
1/2t Salt
1/2t Sugar
1 Small Egg

I'm sorry about the strange amounts above. I like this recipe but it gives enough pastry for 1.5 quiches which is just stupid. So I reduced it. Hence the strange amounts. That said, the extra allowed me to test this recipe with mini quiches as well so I can confirm that it works just as well for that.
 
Grate the butter into the dried ingredients to form fine crumbs. Add the eggs and combine to form a dough. Put in the fridge for 1/2 hour. Roll out the pastry and line a 24cm quiche tin. Prick the bottom of the case with a fork. Line with foil then add whatever you use for baking blind (I used rice). Cover with clingfilm and put in the fridge for 30 minutes. Remove the clingfilm and bake at 180C for 20 minutes. Remove the rice and foil then brush with a beaten egg. Bake for another 20 minutes until lightly golden. Allow to cool.

Filling
 
1T Butter
1T Oil
200g Good quality ham chopped
200g Leeks sliced
3 Eggs
1 Egg yolk
200ml Cream
Nutmeg

Fry the ham in the butter and oil until just starting to crisp then drain on kitchen towel. Fry the leeks, cover with a lid and cook until soft. Whisk the eggs with the cream then season. Scatter the leeks in the pastry case and top with the ham. Fill with the custard. Bake at 180C for 30-35 minutes. If doing the mini quiches blind bake for 10 minutes then for another 10 minutes to brown. Bake with custard for 15 minutes.

ROAST FENNEL AND ROSEMARY BREAD

2T Butter
2T Oil
4 Small fennel bulbs
125ml Orange juice
125ml Vegetable stock
40ml White wine
Zest of 1/2 lemon
5 Peppercorns
2c Flour
1T Baking powder
1t Salt
2 Eggs
300ml Buttermilk
125ml Vegetable oil
80ml Parmesan
2 Sprigs rosemary

Trim the bottom off the fennel bulbs and discard the stems. Cut into quarters. Fry in the butter and oil until golden. Add the juice, stock, wine, zest and peppercorns and simmer for 5 minutes. Transfer to an oven dish and roast for 25 minutes at 400F. Cool and drain.

Combine everything from flour onwards except for the rosemary. Oil a bread tin and fill with half the batter. Cover with most of the fennel then with the rest of the batter. Stick in the last of the fennel and the rosemary. Bake for 40 minutes.